August 2, 2020
When Jackson Carlaw resigned as leader of the Scottish Conservatives, all talk mysteriously centred around the gypsy-baiting MP for Moray, Douglas Ross, replacing him. In other news, former leader Ruth Davidson was to be given a peerage. Reasons unknown.
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July 26, 2020
The self-titled 'Minister for the Union' Boris Johnson paid a flying visit to Scotland in the mistaken belief that his presence would bolster support for said union. He chose remote Orkney - where he was photographed holding crabs - and an RAF base in Lossiemouth, two places he could guarantee protester numbers would be limited.
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July 19, 2020
Health Secretary Matt Hancock was accused of rewriting history after claiming the UK went into lockdown on March 16th and not March 23rd when the Prime Minister actually announced the measure. Meanwhile John Curtice, the UK’s top pollster, said the Yes side is now the favourite to win a second independence referendum, for the first time ever.
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July 12, 2020
Jackson Carlaw claimed a post-Brexit arrangement that would allow Westminster to take control of some devolved powers – effectively a power grab on Holyrood – was the “the right thing to do”. Elsewhere he was eager to play down Scotland’s relative success in containing the spread of Covid-19. Here we imagine how he would deal with being Scotland's First Minister.
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July 5, 2020
Scottish Conservative MSP Murdo Fraser demanded that the First Minister's daily Covid-19 briefings stop, claiming they were party political broadcasts. Meanwhile, the rather more shambolic Westminster briefings had stopped, with Downing Street promsing they would return in the autumn fronted by an experienced broadcaster.
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June 28, 2020
The six Scottish Conservative MPs were among 331 Westminster politicians who voted against a motion that would have led to weekly testing of NHS workers and care staff. One of those politicians was Jeremy Hunt, who had just written a newspaper column calling for that very thing. Meanwhile, Keir Starmer doubled down on his Scottish branch's opposition to a second independence referendum.
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June 21, 2020
Boris Johnson wanted the aircraft that he and senior members of the royal family use to be "rebranded" red, white and blue in order to “better represent” the country when the aircraft travels internationally. The paint job would cost the taxpayer around £900,000.
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June 13, 2020
As part of the 'Black Lives Matter' protests, statues around the world were toppled or defaced. In London, police clashed with far-right, anti-BLM demonstrators who said they were out to protect a statue of Winston Churchill.
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June 7, 2020
Lord Digby Jones - a *Labour* peer - proposed building a new £100m Royal Yacht Britannia to ‘boost morale’ in the UK. Meanwhile back on planet earth, there was a growing sense that Westminster policy was being made up on the fly and that the whole edifice of society could start to crumble at any time.
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May 31, 2020
More than a week after the Prime Minister's top adviser was found to have breached the government's own lockdown rules, and despite no let-up in calls for his resignation, Dominic Cummings was still in the job.
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